A. Stumbling in many things.
I am a born-again and Spirit-filled Christian. I am justified in the name of Jesus and sanctified in the Holy Spirit. I am no longer a slave of sin but a servant of righteousness. But, in my experience I still find myself very weak when I am tempted and fall into sin easily. I was so excited when I read in the Holy Scripture the truth about myself who have been born of God, "Whoever has been born of God does not sin, for His seed remains in him; and he cannot sin, because he has been born of God." (1 John 3:9) So, I expected to have a sinless life or at least seldom to fall into sin. But, my experiences showed the opposite. Instead of living a sinless life, I feel like i have been living a very sinful life. Instead of seldom falling into sin, I have been stumbling in many things frequently, beginning in my word then followed in other things of my body. The apostle James wrote, "For we all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle the whole body." (James 3:2). Therefore, I am so disappointed with myself and I feel very discouraged. Help!
B. Is there still sin in me?
B. Is there still sin in me?
The apostle Paul wrote, "But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God." (1 Corinthians 6:19) Because I have been washed, justified and sanctified in the name of Jesus and by the Spirit of God, there should be no more sin in me. But, why do I still stumble in many sins? Is there still sin in me? What should I believe? Should I believe that there is no more sin in me because of what God has done? Or, should I believe there is still sin in me because my experience shows that I still stumble in many sins? I wish i could believe there is no more sin in me because God's word is truth. But, I cannot deny that my experiences show that i still sin...very often. Help! I am confused!
C. Deceiving myself and making God a liar.
C. Deceiving myself and making God a liar.
I believe with all my heart that the blood of Jesus has made me righteous before God and the power of the Holy Spirit has made me holy in my life. Sin has been completely removed and destroyed in me. So, I no longer have sin in my life because of what God has done. Glory be to God! But, wait a minute. Why did the apostle John write, "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us...If we say we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us." (1 John 1:8,10) So, if I say that I have no sin, then I deceive myself and make God a liar. The truth of God's word is not in me.
D. My biggest problem.
I have problems in my life, but my biggest problem with God. My biggest problem is I have not been able to practice what God has done for me. God has sent His Son to die on the cross for my sins and raised Him from the dead for my righteousness. He also has sent His Holy Spirit so that I can be holy and walk in holiness. But, what have I done? I have been committing so many sins so many times since I believed in the Lord Jesus and was filled with the Holy Spirit. Some sins I have comitted are even more evil than the sins I committed before I believed or than the sins of the people of the world. God has done everything and has given all things to make holy, but I continue to defile myself with sins and selfishness. O wretched man that I am! (Romans 7:24)
E. Falling into the hand of God.
Some time ago I committed a great sin against God that gave a place for the devil. Just about an a hour after i committed sin, something shocking happened to me. I was accused of committing a crime and almost reported to the police. The next night I came to God, humbling myself as much as possible and repenting of my sin. I begged for His mercy. Then, the Holy Spirit reminded of the story of David's sin when he numbered the people of Israel and Judah.
"And David’s heart condemned him after he had numbered the people. So David said to the Lord, “I have sinned greatly in what I have done; but now, I pray, O Lord, take away the iniquity of Your servant, for I have done very foolishly.” Now when David arose in the morning, the word of the Lord
came to the prophet Gad, David’s seer, saying, “Go and tell David, ‘Thus says the Lord: “I offer you three
things; choose one of them for yourself, that I may do it to you.”’” So Gad came to David and told him; and he said to him, “Shall seven years of famine come to you in your land? Or shall you flee three months before your enemies, while they pursue you? Or shall there be three days’ plague in your land? Now consider and see what answer I should take back to Him who sent me.” And David said to Gad, “I am in great distress. Please let us fall into the hand of the Lord, for His mercies are great; but do not let me fall into the hand of man.” (2 Samuel 24:10-14)
God gave David three choices as the punishment for his sin:
1. Seven years of famine in his land. (falling into the hand of the devil)
2. Three months pursued by his enemies. (falling into the hand of man)
3. Three days' plague in his land. (falling into the hand of God)
In my case, I felt that God also gave me three choices because of my sin. Do I want to fall into the hand of the devil or do I want to fall into the hand of man or do I fall into the hand of God? I did not know what would happen to me if I fell into the hand of the devil, but I knew the devil was very evil and cruel. I would suffer for a long time. May be i would be sick or had a bad accident. I did not know what would happen to me if I fell into the hand of man, but I knew people do not forget easily. I would suffer reproach for some time. May be I would be exposed and be shameful. I did not know what would happen to me if I fell into the hand of God, but I knew that God is merciful and will not remember my sin anymore. May be I would be reproved and disciplined. Whether I would fall into the hand of the devil or the hand of man or the hand of God did not depend on the words of my lips but on the state of my heart, how much I humbled myself before God.
F. What is sin?
F. What is sin?
What is sin? The apostle John wrote, "Whoever commits sin also commits lawlessness, and sin is lawlesness." (1 John 3:4) Lawlessness means the breaking of God's commandment. This is a general definition. Whoever breaks God's commandment sins against God. However, for me who have believed in the Lord Jesus and have relationship with God, sin has become more personal. If I sin, I do not just break God's commandment but God's heart as well. That is why every time I sin now, I cause more pain in God's heart than when I sinned as an unbeliever.
G. Sin comes out from my own heart.
G. Sin comes out from my own heart.
Sin comes out from my own heart and it defiles myself. The Lord Jesus said, "What comes out of a man, that defiles a man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a man.” (Mark 7:20-23) So,
sin includes the thought or the intent of my heart that contrary to God's law, not only the act that I do which contrary to God's law.
H. Sin of commission and sin of omission.
H. Sin of commission and sin of omission.
The apostle Paul wrote, "For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice."
(Romans 7:19) God, forgive me because I still commit so many sins although i am no longer a sinner by Your grace. There are many evil things which God commands me not to do that I do and there are many good things which God commands me to do that I do not do. If I do the things which God forbids, then I commit the sins of commission and If I do not do the things which God commands, then I commit the sins of omission. So, both a transgression and a negligence are sin. The apostle James wrote, "Therefore to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin." (James 4:17)
I. My repentance needs repentance.
I realize that the most important thing that I must do immediately when I have sinned is repent. The Holy Spirit taught me that to repent was not just to say sorry to God for my sins but to feel sorrow toward God for my sins as well. When my heart is gentle, I find it easy to repent. But, when my heart is hardened because I have sinned repeatedly, I find it hard to repent. I may be able to say sorry to God for my sins, but I do not feel sorrow in my heart toward God. I only confess my sins, but I do not truly repent from my sins. O God of mercy, deliver me from this evil and wretchedness which have been rooted so deeply in my heart that I need to repent even of my repentance.
